How to talk to your daughter about her body, step one: don’t talk to your daughter about her body, except to teach her how it works.
Don’t say anything if she’s lost weight. Don’t say anything if she’s gained weight.
If you think your daughter’s body looks amazing, don’t say that. Here are some things you can say instead:
“You look so healthy!” is a great one.
Or how about, “you’re looking so strong.”
“I can see how happy you are – you’re glowing.”
Better yet, compliment her on something that has nothing to do with her body.
Don’t comment on other women’s bodies either. Nope. Not a single comment, not a nice one or a mean one.
Teach her about kindness towards others, but also kindness towards yourself.
Don’t you dare talk about how much you hate your body in front of your daughter, or talk about your new diet. In fact, don’t go on a diet in front of your daughter. Buy healthy food. Cook healthy meals. But don’t say “I’m not eating carbs right now.” Your daughter should never think that carbs are evil, because shame over what you eat only leads to shame about yourself.
Encourage your daughter to run because it makes her feel less stressed. Encourage your daughter to climb mountains because there is nowhere better to explore your spirituality than the peak of the universe. Encourage your daughter to surf, or rock climb, or mountain bike because it scares her and that’s a good thing sometimes.
Help your daughter love soccer or rowing or hockey because sports make her a better leader and a more confident woman. Explain that no matter how old you get, you’ll never stop needing good teamwork. Never make her play a sport she isn’t absolutely in love with.
Prove to your daughter that women don’t need men to move their furniture.
Teach your daughter how to cook kale.
Teach your daughter how to bake chocolate cake made with six sticks of butter.
Pass on your own mom’s recipe for Christmas morning coffee cake. Pass on your love of being outside.
Maybe you and your daughter both have thick thighs or wide ribcages. It’s easy to hate these non-size zero body parts. Don’t. Tell your daughter that with her legs she can run a marathon if she wants to, and her ribcage is nothing but a carrying case for strong lungs. She can scream and she can sing and she can lift up the world, if she wants.
Remind your daughter that the best thing she can do with her body is to use it to mobilize her beautiful soul.”
I hope I get to raise a daughter someday
So I work at the mall. I deal with a lot of disappointed, thus, angry people on the daily. and I really hate disappointing them, I do. I really hate when someone brings me a hoodie and they think its 30% off but really its full price and they really love this thing and they are so excited to own it, and then the look of such disappointment etches across their face when they realize, no, its really unreasonably priced…
I hate that.
But I also really hate working at the mall because that is what disappoints people…people get so mad when the shirt they want was accidentally put in the wrong place and now they HAVE to spend more money on this thing and I’ve ruined their christmas because obviously I control these sort of things.
People get so mad. “Yes, that hat is $15 dollars. No, I had nothing to do with that…”
I ruined someone’s christmas today because we ran out of a girl’s jean size…
PEOPLE DO YOU UNDERSTAND THAT YOU ARE GETTING MAD BECAUSE OF OBJECTS?!
YOU THINK THAT BECAUSE YOU SPEND MONEY ON THESE THINGS THAT YOU OWN THEM BUT YOU DON’T, THEY OWN YOU.
Middle-aged woman behind me lookin’ at me like I’m some vain teenager taking pictures of herself.
When in actuality, I’m some vain young adult 20-something taking pictures of herself.
This library is what keeps me sane while I’m home for the holidays.